Tumour Forward
Right, read this:

"Dont care how important u think u r..read and repost this if you dont believe it, call the number. Everyone needs to take the time and read this. Just take a break from all your other stupid bulletins about who is gonna die or if your love life will suck for 7 years and be serious and do the right thing. Repost this or you have no soul seriously. A kid needs our help so do the right thing.

Hi, my name is Matt Dawson. I am 23 years old, and I have a large tumor on my brain and severe lung cancer. The doctors say I will die soon if this isnt fixed, and my family cant pay the bills. "The Make A Wish Foundation" has agreed to donate 7 cents for every time this message is reposted. For those of you who repost, I thank you so much. But for those who dont repost it, I will still pray for you. Please, if you are a kind person, have a heart. Please, please, PLEASE REPOST THIS MESSAGE AS "READ PLEASE"!


Matt Dawson
602-999-7996 Home

Please feel free to call me for anything.

*hey it wont cost you but 10 seconds of your time*


I wont name who sent me this, but they wasted a good 15 seconds of my life by doing so. I shalnt turn this into a rant about forwarded messages, thats been done before. Rather, Im talking about this particular forward. For those who dont receive enough of this shit already, this is actually an exact copy of another fake forward doing the rounds. The only difference is the pretentious, patronising, holier-than-thou opening paragraph. That and the addition of a phone number. What arrogant fuckwit is going to think people are stupid enough to actually call it and check that this forward is genuine? "O yeah, Ill just call an international number I got in a forward to check to see if this email I forward to everyone will actually give this guy his whole 7 cents." I might as well send him a cheque equal to the cost of the phone bill I would have made; Id be making a bigger donation that anyone else (seeing as theirs would be absolute fuck all).

And what does "Please feel free to call me for anything" mean? Why? Why would I call? "Hey Matt, hows it going, still got the tumour? … Oh, no reason, I just got an email from someone telling me you had a brain tumour and that I could help give you 7 cents by forwarding it to people, and it handily included your home number. This is the right number, right? … Oh. Should I try his mobile? … Matt Dawson? … You dont? … Ah … Well, I suppose I should have guessed it was a copy of another email I got yesterday… and yes, I suppose “Matt Dawson” is a really bad fake name. That, and Im thick as shit. Sorry."

And if youre talking to someone who thinks they are very important, try to use correct spelling and grammar. Its even easier to look down on you if you write like a five year old on ketamin. I mean, I manage to. And Fuck-button, you only use an Asterisk notation when theres an asterisk in the actual script.

Although I will say I like the apt description of other forwards as the other stupid bulletins. But to be honest, I personally think that a 23 year old who is relying on people forwarding his tale to fund an operation probably isnt really worth saving.thedailyrant.

Juturna - Circa Survive
Laters.

CIRCA SURVIVE! Mmm confusing is it a Band or the singer from Saosin?