Saturday, March 31, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
7 + 8 + 8 = 23
This is my 788th post.
"And how about this, for those of you who may now be seeing the number 23 everywhere - "The Number 23," which came out on February 23, is Joel Schumacher's 23rd film project. Is this merely coincidence, or is it something more? "
"And how about this, for those of you who may now be seeing the number 23 everywhere - "The Number 23," which came out on February 23, is Joel Schumacher's 23rd film project. Is this merely coincidence, or is it something more? "
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Got god?
I told my mom about the two dreams I had yesterday.
She said, "The first dream is you kill yourself, the second dream is people killing you. That means huh you got no meaning in your life. You find life meaningless. Dream is displayed out subconsiously. Thats why I said you need spiritual guidance. Be it Christianity, Taoism, Buddism or whatsoever, treat it as a subject if you dont want to believe in God. Treat it as a subject....."
"To debate on?" I interrupted. "Debate on the piece of unreliable evidence."
"Well religious is not all about believing in God. You can disapprove of everything they teach and still go to church."
"HAHAHAHA this is funny. What is baptism?"
"I dont know, go through a process and your name will be registered under God and you will be his children. Something like that. And your every month's salary, 1% or 3% will be donated."
I winced in disgust at the words 'God's children'.
"............." I rolled my eyes. "Gees"
"I got a friend, he told me that he donated his money willingly and he strongly believes in God. Cause he said, hes prayers had been answered several times."
"But sadly mine has not been answered once."
"He has devotion and lots of faith. You dont believe in God aye, so you believe in yourself?"
"Errrrrrrrrr, I dont believe in God and I dont believe in myself either. Nothing. Whatever happens in life, you have to be responsible to it, not God. Whatever good things that happen in life, praise yourself, not God. Its stupid, the whole god thing."
-
I need to improve on my verbal literacy. I stutter when speaking, I cant express myself verbally. I seem to have bad english usage when speaking.
LINKIN PARK IS NOT DEAD! WOOOOOOORAY!
She said, "The first dream is you kill yourself, the second dream is people killing you. That means huh you got no meaning in your life. You find life meaningless. Dream is displayed out subconsiously. Thats why I said you need spiritual guidance. Be it Christianity, Taoism, Buddism or whatsoever, treat it as a subject if you dont want to believe in God. Treat it as a subject....."
"To debate on?" I interrupted. "Debate on the piece of unreliable evidence."
"Well religious is not all about believing in God. You can disapprove of everything they teach and still go to church."
"HAHAHAHA this is funny. What is baptism?"
"I dont know, go through a process and your name will be registered under God and you will be his children. Something like that. And your every month's salary, 1% or 3% will be donated."
I winced in disgust at the words 'God's children'.
"............." I rolled my eyes. "Gees"
"I got a friend, he told me that he donated his money willingly and he strongly believes in God. Cause he said, hes prayers had been answered several times."
"But sadly mine has not been answered once."
"He has devotion and lots of faith. You dont believe in God aye, so you believe in yourself?"
"Errrrrrrrrr, I dont believe in God and I dont believe in myself either. Nothing. Whatever happens in life, you have to be responsible to it, not God. Whatever good things that happen in life, praise yourself, not God. Its stupid, the whole god thing."
-
I need to improve on my verbal literacy. I stutter when speaking, I cant express myself verbally. I seem to have bad english usage when speaking.
LINKIN PARK IS NOT DEAD! WOOOOOOORAY!
No Vitamin C in Ribena.
Glad im not a huge fan of Ribena.
"Why does your eyes looks so tired?" Mom asked.
"Dont know."
"But you sleep so much!"
"Yea..."
"It look so lifeless, like you got no life."
"Okay Mom enough." >.>
"You should do volunteer work."
The MV of Nelly Furtado - Say it right, the man in the MV, some of his features, look like someone I once loved.
"Why does your eyes looks so tired?" Mom asked.
"Dont know."
"But you sleep so much!"
"Yea..."
"It look so lifeless, like you got no life."
"Okay Mom enough." >.>
"You should do volunteer work."
The MV of Nelly Furtado - Say it right, the man in the MV, some of his features, look like someone I once loved.
I left the books all alone.
Will power and self-discipline help us to choose our behavior and reactions instead of being their slaves.
Everyone is constantly confronted and tempted by an endless stream of desires and temptations, many of which are not really important or desirable. By learning to refuse to satisfy all of them, you get stronger.
Overcome your laziness. Convince yourself of the importance of what is to be done. Convince your mind that you gain inner strength when you act and do things, in spite of laziness, reluctancy or senseless inner resistance.
Lack of self discipline is a source of low self esteem.
-
I failed again. Failed to study again. I cant push myself.
9 crimes - Damien Rice
Deuce.
Everyone is constantly confronted and tempted by an endless stream of desires and temptations, many of which are not really important or desirable. By learning to refuse to satisfy all of them, you get stronger.
Overcome your laziness. Convince yourself of the importance of what is to be done. Convince your mind that you gain inner strength when you act and do things, in spite of laziness, reluctancy or senseless inner resistance.
Lack of self discipline is a source of low self esteem.
-
I failed again. Failed to study again. I cant push myself.
9 crimes - Damien Rice
Deuce.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Rock season's out for me.
My verbal literacy isnt proportional to my writing literacy.... ?
Currently reading - Is there a creator?
Eh, I seen Avril Lavigne's MV on MTV a few nights ago. Its like singing to a kiddy pop song and playing punk in the MV. She still sucks.
Currently reading - Is there a creator?
Eh, I seen Avril Lavigne's MV on MTV a few nights ago. Its like singing to a kiddy pop song and playing punk in the MV. She still sucks.
Monday, March 26, 2007
But your just so damn sexy.
Betty's sister said this, "First impression thats all I've got. So if I dont flirt with the boys and joke with the girls, they will realise theres not much behind the tight jeans and the low cut top."
It's so refreshing.
"Cause you're so damn sexy when your mad"
Its hard not to think about you when I've got all these songs playing on my playlist.
Damn photobucket being a bitch. Only got one picture uploaded.
It's so refreshing.
"Cause you're so damn sexy when your mad"
Its hard not to think about you when I've got all these songs playing on my playlist.
Damn photobucket being a bitch. Only got one picture uploaded.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Disjointed piece.
After reading through some of my posts, I realised that not every one of my posts are grammatically coherent. X_X
Paya lebar MRT station.
I inhale the last puff of the sweet cancer and flick the ciggarette on to the grass. I watch it burns, disintergrating it into crump of ashes. Oh sweet, I have to stand here for an indefinate time until he arrive. My eyes wander around the station, watching people rushing in and out, to some destination not that I know of. Are they rushing to attend an important appointment? Are they rushing to meet their new date?
A toddler in a yellow dress and purple shoes caught my attention. She looks so cute! It wasnt her looks that made her cute, it was her dressing! She really look like a sunflower. The all bright-in-power sunflower, with a purple shoe. And believe me, her dress is way too big for her. Just by looking at her dress, I saw an image of the olden Dutch or British ladies, with long puffy-blown-up dress. My eyes traverses in search of her parents. Ah, that explains why that toddler was dressed up that way. Her mom looks like one of those Indonesia maid, eating on a cup of jelly as she watches her daughter. Her Dad was wearing a white tee and a bermuda that is way too 'young' for him. His hair looks like the unoriginal version of Bob Marley and it was so unkempt. I can almost imagine his hair with hair brushes sticking out of it.
My eyes wander across the station. A guy in an old fashion gangsta wannabe, stood there. He looks like he is waiting for someone too. Hes hair looks like he poured the whole bin of gel onto his head. His head reflected every light that sink onto it, its so SHINY. I can probably reflect my own image on it. Whats more, its combed in center-parting. He wore some kind of wrist band and neck chains brought from X-craft, which is totally over. My line of sight is interrupted by three teenage girls, chit-chating and laughing away as they walked out of the station.
I dont feel like writing anymore.
*
J brought me to Katong, ate chicken rice, went to Parkway parade. Weeee done some shoppings. Went to East coast. Ran in the rain, went to his friend house, watch bloody soccer, went for breakfast, went home, worn out.
*
The ambiance I created from what the surrounding gave at the East coast was interesting. The sudden strong wind, the leaves rustling loudly, the kids crying, kids running across, the tide rises rapidly. It almost felt like a deja vu. I got a sudden surge to feel great trepidation of what will be happening. I looked up in the sky, I almost saw a billion pair of eyes looking down at me.
*
When we were at the prata house, eating prata, I saw something in him which I never seen before. I dont really know how to put it down into words. I will just end here.
Lost prophets - Last summer
Laters.
P.S The beautiful life. Cant forget that book.
Paya lebar MRT station.
I inhale the last puff of the sweet cancer and flick the ciggarette on to the grass. I watch it burns, disintergrating it into crump of ashes. Oh sweet, I have to stand here for an indefinate time until he arrive. My eyes wander around the station, watching people rushing in and out, to some destination not that I know of. Are they rushing to attend an important appointment? Are they rushing to meet their new date?
A toddler in a yellow dress and purple shoes caught my attention. She looks so cute! It wasnt her looks that made her cute, it was her dressing! She really look like a sunflower. The all bright-in-power sunflower, with a purple shoe. And believe me, her dress is way too big for her. Just by looking at her dress, I saw an image of the olden Dutch or British ladies, with long puffy-blown-up dress. My eyes traverses in search of her parents. Ah, that explains why that toddler was dressed up that way. Her mom looks like one of those Indonesia maid, eating on a cup of jelly as she watches her daughter. Her Dad was wearing a white tee and a bermuda that is way too 'young' for him. His hair looks like the unoriginal version of Bob Marley and it was so unkempt. I can almost imagine his hair with hair brushes sticking out of it.
My eyes wander across the station. A guy in an old fashion gangsta wannabe, stood there. He looks like he is waiting for someone too. Hes hair looks like he poured the whole bin of gel onto his head. His head reflected every light that sink onto it, its so SHINY. I can probably reflect my own image on it. Whats more, its combed in center-parting. He wore some kind of wrist band and neck chains brought from X-craft, which is totally over. My line of sight is interrupted by three teenage girls, chit-chating and laughing away as they walked out of the station.
I dont feel like writing anymore.
*
J brought me to Katong, ate chicken rice, went to Parkway parade. Weeee done some shoppings. Went to East coast. Ran in the rain, went to his friend house, watch bloody soccer, went for breakfast, went home, worn out.
*
The ambiance I created from what the surrounding gave at the East coast was interesting. The sudden strong wind, the leaves rustling loudly, the kids crying, kids running across, the tide rises rapidly. It almost felt like a deja vu. I got a sudden surge to feel great trepidation of what will be happening. I looked up in the sky, I almost saw a billion pair of eyes looking down at me.
*
When we were at the prata house, eating prata, I saw something in him which I never seen before. I dont really know how to put it down into words. I will just end here.
Lost prophets - Last summer
Laters.
P.S The beautiful life. Cant forget that book.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Cockroach invasion!
"CATCH IT CATCH IT!" I bellow, horror leeching into my voice.
"Im trying to." My Dad deadpan.
The cockroach flew out of the way as my Dad's hand descend on it. I look at the cockroach in terror as it hover towards me. I notice the tongue of the cockroach sticking out as it flew. Weird I didnt know cockroach had such a HUGE tongue.
"I give up." My dad surrender, throwing his hands up in the air. "I cant possibly catch all the cockroach in this house."
"THIS HOUSE IS INFESTED WITH IT! MOM YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING" I chagrin, observing the cockroaches crawling its way into the couch. "PLEASE, buy a new couch!" I squirm uneasily in my seat, refusing to sit back and relax for a second. I inspect with caution around me, making sure no cockroaches came near me. I sit back and relax for a moment.
For a moment, I realised I was in bed, eyes still closed. I was reluctant to open my eyes. The last thing I want to see is a menacing flying cockroach with its ugly black tongue out. I lain in my bed, listening to any signs of evil doings. Its fine. The metal window frame contracts from the coldness of the room. I rolled myself into a ball, I felt cold. Damn, I remembered telling Mom that I dont want to use this blanket anymore. Its too small for me, now I have to freeze my ass off every night. Great. I felt the smoothness of my bed and my body. My skin becoming sensitive to any touch of the evilness. Its fine. I opened my eyes. Crap, I dreamt of cockroaches? Then bed squeaked under me when I shifted my body on the bed.
Im no good in interpreting dreams. Something about my fears? I listened to my Granny's footsteps outside the room.
When people regret, they learn something. How many times do I have to regret to finally learn something? Okay now, lets just see how this goes. Where will it take me. I doubt. No where far I reckon. This is no good, I cant sleep anymore. I picked up my cell, 4.30am. I thought about studying every single fucking day. Thinking about it is easy. When your actually doing it, god forbids its a torture. I sighed. Tossed and turned, trying to get some sleep. "When your 50, are you still struggling with your N levels?" Mom's voice echoed loudly from my strings of thoughts. I looked at my sis, snoring away soundly. I always wished I was her, ever since I was kid. Now I wonder, did she ever wished she was me?
I watched the door opened, a sillouhette appeared as I dozed back to sleep.
"Im trying to." My Dad deadpan.
The cockroach flew out of the way as my Dad's hand descend on it. I look at the cockroach in terror as it hover towards me. I notice the tongue of the cockroach sticking out as it flew. Weird I didnt know cockroach had such a HUGE tongue.
"I give up." My dad surrender, throwing his hands up in the air. "I cant possibly catch all the cockroach in this house."
"THIS HOUSE IS INFESTED WITH IT! MOM YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING" I chagrin, observing the cockroaches crawling its way into the couch. "PLEASE, buy a new couch!" I squirm uneasily in my seat, refusing to sit back and relax for a second. I inspect with caution around me, making sure no cockroaches came near me. I sit back and relax for a moment.
For a moment, I realised I was in bed, eyes still closed. I was reluctant to open my eyes. The last thing I want to see is a menacing flying cockroach with its ugly black tongue out. I lain in my bed, listening to any signs of evil doings. Its fine. The metal window frame contracts from the coldness of the room. I rolled myself into a ball, I felt cold. Damn, I remembered telling Mom that I dont want to use this blanket anymore. Its too small for me, now I have to freeze my ass off every night. Great. I felt the smoothness of my bed and my body. My skin becoming sensitive to any touch of the evilness. Its fine. I opened my eyes. Crap, I dreamt of cockroaches? Then bed squeaked under me when I shifted my body on the bed.
Im no good in interpreting dreams. Something about my fears? I listened to my Granny's footsteps outside the room.
When people regret, they learn something. How many times do I have to regret to finally learn something? Okay now, lets just see how this goes. Where will it take me. I doubt. No where far I reckon. This is no good, I cant sleep anymore. I picked up my cell, 4.30am. I thought about studying every single fucking day. Thinking about it is easy. When your actually doing it, god forbids its a torture. I sighed. Tossed and turned, trying to get some sleep. "When your 50, are you still struggling with your N levels?" Mom's voice echoed loudly from my strings of thoughts. I looked at my sis, snoring away soundly. I always wished I was her, ever since I was kid. Now I wonder, did she ever wished she was me?
I watched the door opened, a sillouhette appeared as I dozed back to sleep.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Nao chino!
A dumb decision I made today. I am NOT taking Chinese. And instead I went to register for a stranger subject. Nice move girl, way to go dumbass.
Speaking about dumb, I nearly drowned myself in the shower today.
Speaking about dumb, I nearly drowned myself in the shower today.
Verity.
Deleted an old private blog. It was named as Red-verity. Direct antonym to my current name as Deceit. It was created to suffice my needs to surcease every anger, sorrow, displeasement in me. I read on my private blog, lots of hidings going on. And why did I decided to delete it? I dont see a need anymore as there is nothing to hide anymore. Friends had drifted, who should bother to pass a judgement on what this blog says. My blog is just all about my humble true thoughts.
Qoutes I came upon today,
"A person's greatest strength is always their greatest weakness."
"Ignorance is the beginning of wisdom."
And I hope my ignorance will finally pass on as wisdom.
LiLi said hi. I ignored her. Didnt meant to but no one interrupts my reading period. >D
My instinct tells me that im gonna stink on Audition today. So no point logging in. And im tired to strike up a convo with anyone in particular so I'll save the awkward moments.
Theres no sympathy for the dead - Escape the fate
Deuce.
P.S Onion really makes me FART alot. Lots. Theres even a distinct pain in my gut as the gas seeps its way through, down and out.
Qoutes I came upon today,
"A person's greatest strength is always their greatest weakness."
"Ignorance is the beginning of wisdom."
And I hope my ignorance will finally pass on as wisdom.
LiLi said hi. I ignored her. Didnt meant to but no one interrupts my reading period. >D
My instinct tells me that im gonna stink on Audition today. So no point logging in. And im tired to strike up a convo with anyone in particular so I'll save the awkward moments.
Theres no sympathy for the dead - Escape the fate
Deuce.
P.S Onion really makes me FART alot. Lots. Theres even a distinct pain in my gut as the gas seeps its way through, down and out.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Ugly is the new beautiful.
Some of the quotes I stumbled upon.
"The only unnatural sexual behaviour is none at all."
"An idle mind is the devil's playground."
"If your not that stupid, I can at least explain how stupid you are."
"Why do monks choose to be a monk?
Its better than working for a living."
Finished watching the last episode of Ugly betty. SEASON TWO COME QUICK!
I cant stand the suspense forever.
And maybe I should start a summary or review of every episode of Ugly Betty.
Heh, just a thought.
"The only unnatural sexual behaviour is none at all."
"An idle mind is the devil's playground."
"If your not that stupid, I can at least explain how stupid you are."
"Why do monks choose to be a monk?
Its better than working for a living."
Finished watching the last episode of Ugly betty. SEASON TWO COME QUICK!
I cant stand the suspense forever.
And maybe I should start a summary or review of every episode of Ugly Betty.
Heh, just a thought.
Happily ever after.
And they lived happily ever after.
Thats how the story ends. Naw just kidding. There no happily ever after. Not in this world.
I was so excited to show you me without glasses. Cause you havent seen me with contacts yet. But I guess there wont be a chance for that.
I was suprised. That after all that happens. I show no twinge of sadness. Maybe like I said, I am numb towards all these nonsense. But still, I am not yet giving up searching. I guess I left many memories for them all. But who had left me with memories? Nothing but sorrow. Yes I am numb to it now. If you ask, only one left me with great memories and laughter. Will never forget that guy on the net. Reminds me of the song "Love on the internet." Very talented guy who wrote that song.
Wanna know my opinion on this issue? It is disappointing.
You said you love me, then why decided to end it? Because you cant handle all the issues that cropped up? Then what about me. I endured the pressure of being with you. Its stress to wake up everyday and think about "Will he be please if I wake up too late?" And you even made me look down on myself. Well. It doesnt mean a thing. Its the last goodbye. I dont 'eat the past grass' is what they say in chinese. Thats my rule.
The search continues.
Far away - Nickelback
Lates.
Thats how the story ends. Naw just kidding. There no happily ever after. Not in this world.
I was so excited to show you me without glasses. Cause you havent seen me with contacts yet. But I guess there wont be a chance for that.
I was suprised. That after all that happens. I show no twinge of sadness. Maybe like I said, I am numb towards all these nonsense. But still, I am not yet giving up searching. I guess I left many memories for them all. But who had left me with memories? Nothing but sorrow. Yes I am numb to it now. If you ask, only one left me with great memories and laughter. Will never forget that guy on the net. Reminds me of the song "Love on the internet." Very talented guy who wrote that song.
Wanna know my opinion on this issue? It is disappointing.
You said you love me, then why decided to end it? Because you cant handle all the issues that cropped up? Then what about me. I endured the pressure of being with you. Its stress to wake up everyday and think about "Will he be please if I wake up too late?" And you even made me look down on myself. Well. It doesnt mean a thing. Its the last goodbye. I dont 'eat the past grass' is what they say in chinese. Thats my rule.
The search continues.
Far away - Nickelback
Lates.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Sweet cancer.
I dont wanna sound cynical but I really despise people who obtain songs from the FM. Or mainstream listeners. I hate to feel this way but I cant really refrain myself from having that thoughts.
My friend and I was standing outside his car yesterday, having a taste of the sweet cancer when I noticed the car beside his was 'rocking'. What the face? For heaven's sake. Find a hotel. Guys these days have to even save a cent for these.
-
In any case, I dont accept silent. Id take that as an end.
So, you can stop looking me up if this continues.
You're not alone - SAOSIN
Chaw.
P.S He said I looked better with contacts and I look like a kid with the glasses. LOL. I feel so weird without my geeky glasses though.
My friend and I was standing outside his car yesterday, having a taste of the sweet cancer when I noticed the car beside his was 'rocking'. What the face? For heaven's sake. Find a hotel. Guys these days have to even save a cent for these.
-
In any case, I dont accept silent. Id take that as an end.
So, you can stop looking me up if this continues.
You're not alone - SAOSIN
Chaw.
P.S He said I looked better with contacts and I look like a kid with the glasses. LOL. I feel so weird without my geeky glasses though.
Monday, March 19, 2007
I quit!
After rounding up an all nighter BBQ party, I went to my school to give a letter of 'resignation'.
The walk to the school was depleting more of my energy. I was nervous and uptight about stepping into the school at the same time. I dont want to step in the school ever again. I followed Liyan with a sinking apprehension as she leads the way from her home to the school. An adventurous walk INDEED. We reached the FENCE of the school and we didnt want to walk a huge round, round the renovation blockage. The only way we saw, is a tiny grass path through it. Breathes of curses.
The wet, squishy sound under our slippers as we trot cautiously through the path. We didnt want to get our feet wet and dirty. Its like a walk through a forest. A dead snail, a dead moth, and a dead lizard. Sticky filthy mud acts like a quicksand under us. I pant slightly, sweats seeping out from my tiny pores, adding more humidity to the atmosphere. Oh I wish it was the cold season everyday. Ahh, finally.
I mustered up my confidence as I stepped into the General office. I gave the letter to the clerk who had no least respect for me on my first day of school till the day I left.
"Ms lau right?"
"Yes."
"So... why do you want to quit school? Wheres your letter? You look so different now."
I certainly do looked different and thats why your finally speaking with respect towards me now? Its all about the look?
"Yea, heres the letter."
"Okay...." She studied the letter carefully, satisfied, "Fine. I will get your name out of the records then. Thanks."
"Thanks, bye."
Im just glad we didnt have to walk back through that modification of the forest again. The other route, though, was harder and longer.
"Are we reaching yet?" I complained to Liyan.
"Nop"
"Is it gonna be long?"
"Not really."
"Have we halfway there yet?"
"I dont wanna answer you. You've got so many questions."
I smirks and continues walking. I bids her goodbye as I went on to the bus stop.
I feel that 90% of the people here, just came out of NS or had never seen a lady before. I've got the sex appeal? HAHA. I reckon that. It felt good though.
Ahh, the comfort of the air-con and the seat. I stared out of the window thinking. You know when you look at the view that flashes in momentary outside the window, your mind will wanders. And my wandered to every possible places I could be. Shall not elaborate. Im worn out.
A little girl boarded the bus. She was wearing the Woodlands primary school's uniform. An old man was in front of her, and hes walking slow and unsteadily as his legs deteriorate from old age. The girl was fustrated because she was late for school, she gives a sign of impatient and almost immediately, her expression changed to guilt and gave a smile of embarassment. She was guilty of feeling mad and impatient at the old man blocking her way. She sympatized and understood that age-ing people moves slowly. Somehow, I felt proud of her. She is such a sensible girl at this young age. She dropped off at the next stop. I noticed she was a prefect. The three ladies in front of me, was looking at her as she got off. A lady in her near 50s teared her look away from the girl and shaked her head slightly in disagreement as the bus continues the ride. I understood the lady, the girl was late for school.
The bus ride home is always interesting.
The walk to the school was depleting more of my energy. I was nervous and uptight about stepping into the school at the same time. I dont want to step in the school ever again. I followed Liyan with a sinking apprehension as she leads the way from her home to the school. An adventurous walk INDEED. We reached the FENCE of the school and we didnt want to walk a huge round, round the renovation blockage. The only way we saw, is a tiny grass path through it. Breathes of curses.
The wet, squishy sound under our slippers as we trot cautiously through the path. We didnt want to get our feet wet and dirty. Its like a walk through a forest. A dead snail, a dead moth, and a dead lizard. Sticky filthy mud acts like a quicksand under us. I pant slightly, sweats seeping out from my tiny pores, adding more humidity to the atmosphere. Oh I wish it was the cold season everyday. Ahh, finally.
I mustered up my confidence as I stepped into the General office. I gave the letter to the clerk who had no least respect for me on my first day of school till the day I left.
"Ms lau right?"
"Yes."
"So... why do you want to quit school? Wheres your letter? You look so different now."
I certainly do looked different and thats why your finally speaking with respect towards me now? Its all about the look?
"Yea, heres the letter."
"Okay...." She studied the letter carefully, satisfied, "Fine. I will get your name out of the records then. Thanks."
"Thanks, bye."
Im just glad we didnt have to walk back through that modification of the forest again. The other route, though, was harder and longer.
"Are we reaching yet?" I complained to Liyan.
"Nop"
"Is it gonna be long?"
"Not really."
"Have we halfway there yet?"
"I dont wanna answer you. You've got so many questions."
I smirks and continues walking. I bids her goodbye as I went on to the bus stop.
I feel that 90% of the people here, just came out of NS or had never seen a lady before. I've got the sex appeal? HAHA. I reckon that. It felt good though.
Ahh, the comfort of the air-con and the seat. I stared out of the window thinking. You know when you look at the view that flashes in momentary outside the window, your mind will wanders. And my wandered to every possible places I could be. Shall not elaborate. Im worn out.
A little girl boarded the bus. She was wearing the Woodlands primary school's uniform. An old man was in front of her, and hes walking slow and unsteadily as his legs deteriorate from old age. The girl was fustrated because she was late for school, she gives a sign of impatient and almost immediately, her expression changed to guilt and gave a smile of embarassment. She was guilty of feeling mad and impatient at the old man blocking her way. She sympatized and understood that age-ing people moves slowly. Somehow, I felt proud of her. She is such a sensible girl at this young age. She dropped off at the next stop. I noticed she was a prefect. The three ladies in front of me, was looking at her as she got off. A lady in her near 50s teared her look away from the girl and shaked her head slightly in disagreement as the bus continues the ride. I understood the lady, the girl was late for school.
The bus ride home is always interesting.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
The dream.
The lady whimpered in fear. The man was scrawny and deranged. He grimaced menacingly, hes eyes gleamed with wrath. I reckon the man had a saddening past. The man raised his axe, a high shriek of trepidation rings through the gloomy and ominous house.
I woke up. The windows were opened widely across. I refused to open my eyes. I lain in the comforts of my pillows and blankets. The warmth of the noon made me felt drowsy. I listened to the cadence of the conversation outside the room and the soothing music of 'War and Beauty [instrumental]', it was assuring.
"I really feel that hes a good man..." Thats the last I heard from my Sis as I dosed back to sleep.
The man sliced his blade through the air, and off the lady's neck. A hydraulic 'Plop' as the her head hits the ground. The man smiled slightly, his eyes wrinkled as he squinted through the blood-stained curtains. He sighed a breath of accomplishment. He turned off the tv, sat on the couch and sipped on a glass of Dirty Martini.
I woke up abruptly again. Ahh, I wonder why's that dream. I havent read crimelibrary for a long time. This is weird. I shifted with difficulty and picked up my clock. It was 3.45PM. Did I sleep that long? I closed my eyes again, reluctant to acknownledge the world just yet. I sang to the song 'Damn regret - The red jumpsuit apparatus' that was playing in the background. I picked my phone up and looked at the msges. I looked at the time again, it was 12.45PM. I glimpse at the time again suspiciously.
Hopped off my bed and started my day.
I woke up. The windows were opened widely across. I refused to open my eyes. I lain in the comforts of my pillows and blankets. The warmth of the noon made me felt drowsy. I listened to the cadence of the conversation outside the room and the soothing music of 'War and Beauty [instrumental]', it was assuring.
"I really feel that hes a good man..." Thats the last I heard from my Sis as I dosed back to sleep.
The man sliced his blade through the air, and off the lady's neck. A hydraulic 'Plop' as the her head hits the ground. The man smiled slightly, his eyes wrinkled as he squinted through the blood-stained curtains. He sighed a breath of accomplishment. He turned off the tv, sat on the couch and sipped on a glass of Dirty Martini.
I woke up abruptly again. Ahh, I wonder why's that dream. I havent read crimelibrary for a long time. This is weird. I shifted with difficulty and picked up my clock. It was 3.45PM. Did I sleep that long? I closed my eyes again, reluctant to acknownledge the world just yet. I sang to the song 'Damn regret - The red jumpsuit apparatus' that was playing in the background. I picked my phone up and looked at the msges. I looked at the time again, it was 12.45PM. I glimpse at the time again suspiciously.
Hopped off my bed and started my day.
I keep a sinister smile and a hole in my heart.
Ahh finally able to talk to Lili. <3
Well shes still the same, insecurity about going into relationship. For me, it doesnt matter. As my heart is already dead. So it wont hurt that much anymore. Maybe, its not dead, its just filled up with the photos of the past. Nothing or no one can ever get in anymore.
Lucas isss soo inlove with her! She was like, "No more LDR for me." And I told her, "Yea same for me, as it usually doesnt work out. None for me! But uhhhh, if only its Lan, then maybe, I might. =D" "LOL"
Me: "Lucas........ should get a GF."
HAHAHA. I feel bad for him. >_< So many insecure people around tho in a different extent.
Lili plays on InstinctRO now. And she told me she donated again on that server more than what she donated on Kaz3RO. I told her, "Aint you afraid history might happens again?"
If I were her, I wouldnt. Shows how rich people are. Mmm. Generous.
The policy of playing in bbgRO, "Just talk to the right people and you will survive."
Then we went on, gossiping about our friends. Hee hee. But ya, at least someone feels the same way I do about that particular person.
Naruke, khoa WANTS me in surgeRO. HAHA!
Dennis and Nii wants me too.
Lili wants me in InstinctRO.
Seth wants me in some server I forgot.
But if I really do play, I would so much rather go to darkRO. Cause hes there.
I dunno, Lili might hook me up with stuffs. Heueahuea. Its a BR server. Nice. Eu gosto BRs! Eles e legal e LINDOOOOO! Hee hee, reminds me of Bruno. DOCE~ Meu lindo amo.
Hero, heroine - Boys like girls.
Chaw.
P.S I cant refrain myself from comparing. To live over again and to deal with the pain you brought me, I will still choose you.
P.S.S I did promise to what you wanted, do you even care what I really wanted? All you do is say a whole lot of stuffs to proof you aint wrong. This wont work out, I promise.
Well shes still the same, insecurity about going into relationship. For me, it doesnt matter. As my heart is already dead. So it wont hurt that much anymore. Maybe, its not dead, its just filled up with the photos of the past. Nothing or no one can ever get in anymore.
Lucas isss soo inlove with her! She was like, "No more LDR for me." And I told her, "Yea same for me, as it usually doesnt work out. None for me! But uhhhh, if only its Lan, then maybe, I might. =D" "LOL"
Me: "Lucas........ should get a GF."
HAHAHA. I feel bad for him. >_< So many insecure people around tho in a different extent.
Lili plays on InstinctRO now. And she told me she donated again on that server more than what she donated on Kaz3RO. I told her, "Aint you afraid history might happens again?"
If I were her, I wouldnt. Shows how rich people are. Mmm. Generous.
The policy of playing in bbgRO, "Just talk to the right people and you will survive."
Then we went on, gossiping about our friends. Hee hee. But ya, at least someone feels the same way I do about that particular person.
Naruke, khoa WANTS me in surgeRO. HAHA!
Dennis and Nii wants me too.
Lili wants me in InstinctRO.
Seth wants me in some server I forgot.
But if I really do play, I would so much rather go to darkRO. Cause hes there.
I dunno, Lili might hook me up with stuffs. Heueahuea. Its a BR server. Nice. Eu gosto BRs! Eles e legal e LINDOOOOO! Hee hee, reminds me of Bruno. DOCE~ Meu lindo amo.
Hero, heroine - Boys like girls.
Chaw.
P.S I cant refrain myself from comparing. To live over again and to deal with the pain you brought me, I will still choose you.
P.S.S I did promise to what you wanted, do you even care what I really wanted? All you do is say a whole lot of stuffs to proof you aint wrong. This wont work out, I promise.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
E-drama.
Stupid brainless racist peoples.
I was like, "You got a problem with that?"
Nub'O fag[not exactly his name]:Got
Me:Suck it up then
Nub'O fag: You then lor
*LOL, is that all you got? Retarded come back, does he even understand what I said*
-Pointless dramas continues-
Me: Learn english and learn one-two party before talking to me. Faggit.
Typical singaporeans.
I was like, "You got a problem with that?"
Nub'O fag[not exactly his name]:Got
Me:Suck it up then
Nub'O fag: You then lor
*LOL, is that all you got? Retarded come back, does he even understand what I said*
-Pointless dramas continues-
Me: Learn english and learn one-two party before talking to me. Faggit.
Typical singaporeans.
Perfection will not come.
This old song seems to fit you.
There are certain people you just keep coming back to.
She is right in front of you.
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now shes in question.
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and
The right thing are the same.
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her,
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there.
Looking for the right one you line up the world
To find where no questions cross your mind.
But she wont keep on waiting for you
Without a doubt.
Much longer for you to sort it out.
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you had her, maybe you lost her to another.
There are certain people you just keep coming back to.
She is right in front of you.
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now shes in question.
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and
The right thing are the same.
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her,
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there.
Looking for the right one you line up the world
To find where no questions cross your mind.
But she wont keep on waiting for you
Without a doubt.
Much longer for you to sort it out.
Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you had her, maybe you lost her to another.
Friday, March 16, 2007
When darkness turns to light.
My fear of regrets always helps me at different times. Times where I dont need it.
Sometime, I had already made a small note to self, more like a decision.
When its time for me to open my mouth, I just couldnt get myself to do it.
Theres always this inhibition that stops me. That is my fear of regret.
I always regret in w.e decision I made. It be, choosing of food, ending of stuffs or w.e. It always seems I cant make decisions.
Whatever it is, I shall procrastinate til theres a change.
I guess there is no one in the world that will ever look up upon me.
People would most prolly look down on me. And no one in the world could ever know me.
This is crazy but my will for life has been wavering for a long time.
The only thing that stops me is the title of infilial.
If my parents are gone, nothing could ever stop me again.
Things are not that easy as you seems.
Stuffs like that, could be easy for you, but im sorry, I CANT.
It is not easy for me. Try being me. Its not like I dont want. I want to. But I cant.
You are what you are, I am what I am. Doesnt it make so much sense?
You can do it doesnt means that I can do the same and as easy as you can do it.
No, it doesnt. And it wont. Even if Id try, its gonna be ugly. Its gonna look as bad.
Im sorry I aint perfect. Im prolly the only thing that isnt perfect in your life.
Just one word, you can just give me a word, and I'll go.
It ends tonight - All american rejects
Bai.
Sometime, I had already made a small note to self, more like a decision.
When its time for me to open my mouth, I just couldnt get myself to do it.
Theres always this inhibition that stops me. That is my fear of regret.
I always regret in w.e decision I made. It be, choosing of food, ending of stuffs or w.e. It always seems I cant make decisions.
Whatever it is, I shall procrastinate til theres a change.
I guess there is no one in the world that will ever look up upon me.
People would most prolly look down on me. And no one in the world could ever know me.
This is crazy but my will for life has been wavering for a long time.
The only thing that stops me is the title of infilial.
If my parents are gone, nothing could ever stop me again.
Things are not that easy as you seems.
Stuffs like that, could be easy for you, but im sorry, I CANT.
It is not easy for me. Try being me. Its not like I dont want. I want to. But I cant.
You are what you are, I am what I am. Doesnt it make so much sense?
You can do it doesnt means that I can do the same and as easy as you can do it.
No, it doesnt. And it wont. Even if Id try, its gonna be ugly. Its gonna look as bad.
Im sorry I aint perfect. Im prolly the only thing that isnt perfect in your life.
Just one word, you can just give me a word, and I'll go.
It ends tonight - All american rejects
Bai.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
How bored are you?
| You Communicate With Your Ears |
 You love conversations, both as a listener and a talker. What people say is important to you, and you're often most affected by words, not actions. You love to hear complements from others. And when you're upset, you often talk to yourself. Music is very important to you. It's difficult to find you without your iPod. |
| You Are a Pundit Blogger! |
 Your blog is smart, insightful, and always a quality read. Truly appreciated by many, surpassed by only a few |
| Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ISFP) |
 Your personality type is caring, peaceful, artistic, and calm. Only about 7% of all people have your personality, including 8% of all women and 6% of all men You are Introverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Perceiving. |
| You Are Really Not Happy |
 You may have noticed that things aren't going too well for you lately. Your life never used to be like this, but it seems like happiness is slipping away from you. You definitely need a change, because whatever you have going on isn't working. It's time for you to shake things up - even if it means totally changing your life path. |
| Your Social Anxiety Level: 64% |
 You have high social anxiety. You have a pretty serious social phobia, and it effects your life more than you may realize. It's possible that you've made yourself comfortable by avoiding situations you dread. But don't be fooled - you still probably need professional help. |
| Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence |
 You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator. |
| Your Depression Level: 76% |
 You seem to have moderate depression. Your symptoms are bad enough that they're effecting your everyday life. You would benefit greatly from professional help. |
| You Are 88% Bipolar |
 You have some serious ups and downs, maybe to the point of endangering your own life. Consult a doctor to see if you may truly have bipolar disorder. |
| You're Totally Sarcastic |
 You sarcastic? Never! You're as sweet as a baby bunny. Seriously, though, you have a sharp tongue - and you aren't afraid to use it. And if people are too wimpy to deal with your attitutde, then too bad. So sad. |
| You Are 82% Indie |
 You're so indie, it's kind of amazing that you actually found your way to this quiz. Generally, your tastes are genuinely indie... but sometimes you like something just because it's weird! |
| Your Scholastic Strength Is Deep Thinking |
 You aren't afraid to delve head first into a difficult subject, with mastery as your goal. You are talented at adapting, motivating others, managing resources, and analyzing risk. You should major in: Philosophy Music Theology Art History Foreign language |
| You Are A Jealous Ex |
 You're not quite over your past, and you are hurt that your ex is moving on You're no longer in love, but you're not done with being pissed Jealous of any happiness that comes your ex's way, you still can't let go |
| You Are an Emo Rocker! |
 Expressive and deep, lyrics are really your thing. That doesn't mean you don't rock out... You just rock out with meaning. For you, rock is more about connecting than grandstanding. |
| How You Life Your Life |
 You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside. You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think. You tend to have one best friend you hang with, as opposed to many aquaintences. Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down. |
Oh you do?
Why do so much, ponder about life?
After all, life is just all about these four W questions.
What
When
Where
With
I mean, I ask questions to myself everyday. And I beg for an answer.
After all, life is just all about these four W questions.
What
When
Where
With
I mean, I ask questions to myself everyday. And I beg for an answer.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Crimson.
Like I said before somewhere buried in the archives, optimistic ruins me.
I always thought that this tide will ease and everything will goes smoothly like its planned out. But no, this "crisis" is far longer than I've expected. For years.
Can I sit here anymore?
Went to Pub. Wow, so hard to actually find a place to chill out. Too late, everything is closed. Found one, its fucking rowdy. I would so much prefer pubs in Chinatown. Reason I dont like to go to Boat quey. Sit around for like an hour or two, they are closed. Think we will get back to finish the Chivas. Nyah. ;]
My knife, your throat - Scary kid scaring kids
Lates.
I always thought that this tide will ease and everything will goes smoothly like its planned out. But no, this "crisis" is far longer than I've expected. For years.
Can I sit here anymore?
Went to Pub. Wow, so hard to actually find a place to chill out. Too late, everything is closed. Found one, its fucking rowdy. I would so much prefer pubs in Chinatown. Reason I dont like to go to Boat quey. Sit around for like an hour or two, they are closed. Think we will get back to finish the Chivas. Nyah. ;]
My knife, your throat - Scary kid scaring kids
Lates.
Smashed into pieces.
Never Again.
Ill slit my throat with the knife I pulled out of my spine.
Maybe when you find out that Im dead,
youll realize what you did to me.
And if my lungs still let me breathe,
would you be there for me?
If I can make myself believe,
Ill give you back what you took away.
No, I wont let it go.
Douse myself in gasoline.
So dont save me when you come into the fire.
Id rather die than have to see your smile.
Ill slit my throat with the knife I pulled out of my spine.
Maybe when you find out that Im dead,
youll realize what you did to me.
And if my lungs still let me breathe,
would you be there for me?
If I can make myself believe,
Ill give you back what you took away.
No, I wont let it go.
Douse myself in gasoline.
So dont save me when you come into the fire.
Id rather die than have to see your smile.
Do you swear? "Fuck no."
For boundaries that you not even suppose to cross.
I thank hell for making life on earth insufferable.
I thank hell for making life on earth insufferable.
Monday, March 12, 2007
The Zodiac Killer.
Cryptogram sent by the Zodiac killer. On 1969.
I LIKE KILLING PEOPLE BECAUSE IT IS SO MUCH FUN
IT IS MORE FUN THAN KILLING WILD GAME IN THE FORREST BECAUSE MAN IS THE MOST DANGEROUE ANIMAL OF ALL TO KILL SOMETHING GIVES ME THE MOST THRILLING EXPERENCE
IT IS EVEN BETTER THAN GETTING YOUR ROCKS OFF WITH A GIRL
THE BEST PART IS THAE WHEN I DIE I WILL BE REBORN IN PARADICE AND ALL THE I HAVE KILLED WILL BECOME MY SLAVES
I WILL NOT GIVE YOU MY NAME BECAUSE YOU WILL TRY TO SLOI DOWN OR STOP MY COLLECTING OF SLAVES FOR MY AFTERLIFE EBEORIETEMETHHPITI
The last letter on 1978.
Dear Editor
This is the Zodiac speaking I am back with you. Tell herb caen I am here, I have always been here. That city pig toschi is good but I am bu [crossed out] smarter and better he will get tired then leave me alone. I am waiting for a good movie about me. Who will play me. I am now in control of all things.
yours truly:
[crossed circle] guess
SFPD - 0
-
Ironically, a movie is about you is out finally on 2007. Your prolly dead with your "slaves" and never ever gonna see it. Thats too bad.
Freaking 40 chapters on crimelibrary. Its sad that he never got caught and no professionals can get to understand him. The case was boring.
Time for the Zodiac movie, got it off bittorrent.
The Zodiac Killer
Cat and mouse - The red jumpsuit apparatus
Chaw.
I LIKE KILLING PEOPLE BECAUSE IT IS SO MUCH FUN
IT IS MORE FUN THAN KILLING WILD GAME IN THE FORREST BECAUSE MAN IS THE MOST DANGEROUE ANIMAL OF ALL TO KILL SOMETHING GIVES ME THE MOST THRILLING EXPERENCE
IT IS EVEN BETTER THAN GETTING YOUR ROCKS OFF WITH A GIRL
THE BEST PART IS THAE WHEN I DIE I WILL BE REBORN IN PARADICE AND ALL THE I HAVE KILLED WILL BECOME MY SLAVES
I WILL NOT GIVE YOU MY NAME BECAUSE YOU WILL TRY TO SLOI DOWN OR STOP MY COLLECTING OF SLAVES FOR MY AFTERLIFE EBEORIETEMETHHPITI
The last letter on 1978.
Dear Editor
This is the Zodiac speaking I am back with you. Tell herb caen I am here, I have always been here. That city pig toschi is good but I am bu [crossed out] smarter and better he will get tired then leave me alone. I am waiting for a good movie about me. Who will play me. I am now in control of all things.
yours truly:
[crossed circle] guess
SFPD - 0
-
Ironically, a movie is about you is out finally on 2007. Your prolly dead with your "slaves" and never ever gonna see it. Thats too bad.
Freaking 40 chapters on crimelibrary. Its sad that he never got caught and no professionals can get to understand him. The case was boring.
Time for the Zodiac movie, got it off bittorrent.
The Zodiac Killer
Cat and mouse - The red jumpsuit apparatus
Chaw.
The magic.
I like the part where she sang
"Cant ever keep from falling apart at the seams
Cant I believe you're taking my heart to pieces"
I love the feeling every piece of music gave me.
Different song, different feeling.
Unspeakable feeling. *Spaced out silently*
Ahh well. Lots of thoughts, racing thoughts.
But I cant really put it down.
No idea how to.
FOCUS girl.
November rain - Gun N roses
Deuce.
"Cant ever keep from falling apart at the seams
Cant I believe you're taking my heart to pieces"
I love the feeling every piece of music gave me.
Different song, different feeling.
Unspeakable feeling. *Spaced out silently*
Ahh well. Lots of thoughts, racing thoughts.
But I cant really put it down.
No idea how to.
FOCUS girl.
November rain - Gun N roses
Deuce.
Lightness.
It struck me like a sudden wind when he said he like me. I didnt expect that. I mean what do you expect from someone like him? Well. I dont know. It really seems like a facade to cover up what I really feel about him. I dont like it. I really dont. Tho sometimes I always say its my favourite sin. But no, I really dont like it. I dont worth a 50 bucks. Thats what I said to myself. But do others see it that way? No.
-
Really glad we talked again. And again. And again. Really miss all those chats. It really hit me when you said we have something in common. We both hate school. And I added in, "But we wanna study." Its really sad. I dont know if I did saw the look on your face. But, I saw a reflection. Can I just stop regressing?
We laugh indoors - Death cab for cutie
Lates.
-
Really glad we talked again. And again. And again. Really miss all those chats. It really hit me when you said we have something in common. We both hate school. And I added in, "But we wanna study." Its really sad. I dont know if I did saw the look on your face. But, I saw a reflection. Can I just stop regressing?
We laugh indoors - Death cab for cutie
Lates.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
EDITS: I saw Xiong the chef on friday at CWP! HE COULDNT REGONISE ME! I looked at him. He was like, why this girl looking at me. Then I walked pass him. For a few seconds, I turned, and he turned. He was like "EH?" I yelled at him, "YOU FORGOT ME?!!" Hes like, *Smiles*
Went to Swensen's with my Sis and Dad today. Mmmm =D
I AM lazy to blog these few days. So yeh I guess will just stop here!
Apology - Alesana
Lates.
Went to Swensen's with my Sis and Dad today. Mmmm =D
I AM lazy to blog these few days. So yeh I guess will just stop here!
Apology - Alesana
Lates.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
The Malay.
O....kay. Lets start with.
Friday, March 09.
Woke up early in the morning to help my granny carry groceries home. At least I've gotten something out of it! I threw three packets of kinder brano and a CNC ice cream into the basket. My granny was VERY happy that i followed her to NTUC. She was talking talking talking nonstop the whole journey and smiling so widely like a "laughing buddha". Went out with YT. Bought a bag and regretted as usual. I should have bought that brown one. Tho i was very reluntant to buy a bag. I saw SOO many shoes on OFFER. So tempted to buy them. And i want a contact lens. Sick of the old geeky look. Complained the whole day of the heat and pain on my foot.
BBQ party for Lee Yun's birthday. We waited for PY to arrived at Vista park. A figure appeared at the corner of my eyes, asking for a lighter. I looked at them, two Malay guys. Mmmm okay.
After they lighted their ciggies, one guy said, "Hey you looked familiar."
Me: "Mmm you dont looked familiar."
*Thinking at the same time, bad pick-up line*
Him: "Oooo you isit at that 630 coffee shop? That time your Dad with you right?"
Me: "OOo I remembered!"
The coffeeshop at my house, downstairs. A year ago, a new Malay food store opened for business. Whenever I went down with my dad to eat, I always noticed that store's owner. He was sooo cute and its rare to see young adults selling food at the hawker center. He always have his friends come over to the coffee shop to slack. And SUDDENLY, theres so many Malays at 630. And that guy I met yesterday, is one of his friend that always saw me eating there.
Kay, the BBQ was kind of boring.
Friday, March 09.
Woke up early in the morning to help my granny carry groceries home. At least I've gotten something out of it! I threw three packets of kinder brano and a CNC ice cream into the basket. My granny was VERY happy that i followed her to NTUC. She was talking talking talking nonstop the whole journey and smiling so widely like a "laughing buddha". Went out with YT. Bought a bag and regretted as usual. I should have bought that brown one. Tho i was very reluntant to buy a bag. I saw SOO many shoes on OFFER. So tempted to buy them. And i want a contact lens. Sick of the old geeky look. Complained the whole day of the heat and pain on my foot.
BBQ party for Lee Yun's birthday. We waited for PY to arrived at Vista park. A figure appeared at the corner of my eyes, asking for a lighter. I looked at them, two Malay guys. Mmmm okay.
After they lighted their ciggies, one guy said, "Hey you looked familiar."
Me: "Mmm you dont looked familiar."
*Thinking at the same time, bad pick-up line*
Him: "Oooo you isit at that 630 coffee shop? That time your Dad with you right?"
Me: "OOo I remembered!"
The coffeeshop at my house, downstairs. A year ago, a new Malay food store opened for business. Whenever I went down with my dad to eat, I always noticed that store's owner. He was sooo cute and its rare to see young adults selling food at the hawker center. He always have his friends come over to the coffee shop to slack. And SUDDENLY, theres so many Malays at 630. And that guy I met yesterday, is one of his friend that always saw me eating there.
Kay, the BBQ was kind of boring.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
The PRO?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUNNY SHIT! Was bored as hell. Went into the nooby zone with my nooby hair with the nooby clothing with the NOOBY LOOK. Look what happened in the end.
AHHHHHHHH IM SOO LONELY HAHAHAHA! Everyone ran off........... Thats so sad and depressing! Im tearing of laughters. Annoying tho. Thanks for filling my boredom.
AHHHHHHHH IM SOO LONELY HAHAHAHA! Everyone ran off........... Thats so sad and depressing! Im tearing of laughters. Annoying tho. Thanks for filling my boredom.
The myth.
My mom said, "If nothing seems to help, I think you ought to seek everything you need from spiritual."
I was like, "Hell no! Nuh uh! Not gonna happen okay so just drop it."
Shes been going on and on about that. She EVEN told me to follow my granny to some buddism [not sure if I spell it right, i dont bother to check either]talk, if I really dont like the sound of church.
Errr no? No thank you? What? Go follow her and talk to a bunch of grannies? Nuuuh. One is already really enough for me to handle =]
No, seriously. I am not interested in god and I dont think it is interested in me either. Period. I dont need help from something I dont believe in.
Ugly betty is a goooood show. Far more better than The pursuit of HappYness. Really.
I learnt so much, much more in this show than that movie.
Should really listen to them talk. Lots of quotes is really touching.
I was really thinking about myself in this show. Betty's sister. Seems like we are similiar to a different extent.
-
Text extracted from the book, "When a child kills: Abused Children Who Kill Their Parents" - By Paul Mones
Kids who kill their parents are usually peaceful and have parents that are very private and secretive. Mones found that these children have a low self-opinion of themselves and react only after suffering abuse silently, usually after years of trying unsuccessfully to please their parents. According to Mones, when these children fight back, they strike when their abuser is vulnerable. The crimes tend to be characterized by overkill, instead of one bullet being fired at the abuser, the child will shoot the abuser over and over again. Mones believes that when a parent is murdered, it is their fault.
Mmm, interesting. Okay I should exit "Crimelibrary" now before I get all paranoid and freak myself out at this point of the night. Yes that always happens.
A boy brushed red.. Living in black and white - Underoath
Lates.
I was like, "Hell no! Nuh uh! Not gonna happen okay so just drop it."
Shes been going on and on about that. She EVEN told me to follow my granny to some buddism [not sure if I spell it right, i dont bother to check either]talk, if I really dont like the sound of church.
Errr no? No thank you? What? Go follow her and talk to a bunch of grannies? Nuuuh. One is already really enough for me to handle =]
No, seriously. I am not interested in god and I dont think it is interested in me either. Period. I dont need help from something I dont believe in.
Ugly betty is a goooood show. Far more better than The pursuit of HappYness. Really.
I learnt so much, much more in this show than that movie.
Should really listen to them talk. Lots of quotes is really touching.
I was really thinking about myself in this show. Betty's sister. Seems like we are similiar to a different extent.
-
Text extracted from the book, "When a child kills: Abused Children Who Kill Their Parents" - By Paul Mones
Kids who kill their parents are usually peaceful and have parents that are very private and secretive. Mones found that these children have a low self-opinion of themselves and react only after suffering abuse silently, usually after years of trying unsuccessfully to please their parents. According to Mones, when these children fight back, they strike when their abuser is vulnerable. The crimes tend to be characterized by overkill, instead of one bullet being fired at the abuser, the child will shoot the abuser over and over again. Mones believes that when a parent is murdered, it is their fault.
Mmm, interesting. Okay I should exit "Crimelibrary" now before I get all paranoid and freak myself out at this point of the night. Yes that always happens.
A boy brushed red.. Living in black and white - Underoath
Lates.
The district sleeps tonight.
"Its like when the city stops, theres this silence and everything sparkles."
I NEED the last episode of Ugly Betty! Im soooooooo in suspense.
And theres only 17 episode ;[ Im gonna miss Betty!
And of course, Daniel Meade. Soooo cute.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
| On the Swirve Personality Test, I am an Architect. My Characteristics Chart:
Read more about Architects or take the Test yourself! |
On the Swirve Personality Test, I am an Architect. About me:
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Heh, just reminising. I always dig in the past. Its just cause i have nothing better and useful to do. ;P
I miss the hatties I used to make.
The word, "Alde steps, Alde steps."
Gonyrun <3
Amatsu
Aldebaran
Louyang
Those BGMs bring back memories. Good ones only. Its weird how memories only bring back the good ones.
I cant seems to feel any of the bad ones. The negative ones. Its only the happy ones I am feeling.
Its a pity I lost the reeeaally really old screenies. When it all started. You got no idea how much screenies I have now and you got no idea how much I feel for this so called 'phenomenon'. A great lovely experience. Okay i should stop, now i sounded like an addict. --;
Ahh man. I might just go back and start some new memories. ;]
Be fugly.
Wee. I dont need to catch every series of Ugly Betty on Sundays anymore. I got the full episode on download! Nyah! Its really touching. Another show of a strong personality. I WISH I WAS THEM. Why is it so hard to be strong for me?
"Snow is a magical blanket. It hides whats ugly and make everything beautiful."
"Snow is a magical blanket. It hides whats ugly and make everything beautiful."
Monday, March 05, 2007
Cant stand cocky people. Excuse me. Dont have to ask us wtf is jy? What is liao? What is la? If you cant stand our AZN language, then please STFUGTFO. Get out of this AZN server. We dont want you here.
If you think you are so perfect in your english then wtf is "thats all people stupid is say" WTF is that?! O please yous a joker. Get out.
Dont wait - Dashboard confessional
Bai.
If you think you are so perfect in your english then wtf is "thats all people stupid is say" WTF is that?! O please yous a joker. Get out.
Dont wait - Dashboard confessional
Bai.
They come and go.
Lots of people thought I am weird. In taste, behaviour or w.e.
Friends asked why am I attracted to Malays instead of Chinese. Couldnt give them a sure answer til then.
I might have the answer now.
Its prolly because, when I was young, I was infatuated with a Malay guy sitting next to me in class everyday. But he migrated to Indonesia. He was the sweetest thing in my childhood memory. ;D
The likings, personal behaviour, individual charactor, is nurtured, formed or 'created' from the period when you are borned till early teens.
So yea. The creation of Trish. Tee hee.
Karma Chameleon - Culture club
Deuce.
P.S Kinda miss all those chattings.
Friends asked why am I attracted to Malays instead of Chinese. Couldnt give them a sure answer til then.
I might have the answer now.
Its prolly because, when I was young, I was infatuated with a Malay guy sitting next to me in class everyday. But he migrated to Indonesia. He was the sweetest thing in my childhood memory. ;D
The likings, personal behaviour, individual charactor, is nurtured, formed or 'created' from the period when you are borned till early teens.
So yea. The creation of Trish. Tee hee.
Karma Chameleon - Culture club
Deuce.
P.S Kinda miss all those chattings.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
The search.
Pursuit of happYness. A short conclusion, Happiness = Accomplishment.
To know that you CAN do it. He pushed on at the edge of giving up. When everything is against him. When there seems no more hope left.
At that very moment, I may be thinking, theres nothing more I can do, i failed. But no, he pushed on, and do everything to make it happen.
The spoiled scanner, being homeless, sleeping in the toilet with every depressing emotions.
He was so afraid that the door would open.
He was so afraid that their ONLY place to spend the night is lost. To lose it.
The part where I cried, is when he said,
"Maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue. And maybe we can actually never have it no matter what."
I cried. I never see myself in the future with happiness.
"Don't ever let someone tell you, you can't do something. Not even me. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period.".
I cried again. O the irony. Its rather like, people dont have to tell me that I cant do it. Cause I already said that to myself.
And the toilet scene was really heart wrenching. I cried because of the fear in him.
At the end, like I said before, it is all worth it.
HES THE MAN BABY, HES THE MAN!
I wish I had the determination that he had. Hes strong. Real strong.
Didnt really felt much inspiration from this movie tho. No inspiration to do some thinking.
Okay, maybe its just theres not much emotions in me today.
Chaw.
To know that you CAN do it. He pushed on at the edge of giving up. When everything is against him. When there seems no more hope left.
At that very moment, I may be thinking, theres nothing more I can do, i failed. But no, he pushed on, and do everything to make it happen.
The spoiled scanner, being homeless, sleeping in the toilet with every depressing emotions.
He was so afraid that the door would open.
He was so afraid that their ONLY place to spend the night is lost. To lose it.
The part where I cried, is when he said,
"Maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue. And maybe we can actually never have it no matter what."
I cried. I never see myself in the future with happiness.
"Don't ever let someone tell you, you can't do something. Not even me. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period.".
I cried again. O the irony. Its rather like, people dont have to tell me that I cant do it. Cause I already said that to myself.
And the toilet scene was really heart wrenching. I cried because of the fear in him.
At the end, like I said before, it is all worth it.
HES THE MAN BABY, HES THE MAN!
I wish I had the determination that he had. Hes strong. Real strong.
Didnt really felt much inspiration from this movie tho. No inspiration to do some thinking.
Okay, maybe its just theres not much emotions in me today.
Chaw.
Friday, March 02, 2007
A sillhouette behind the rain.
In this dark room, even the sun is not gonna watch this apocalypse.
The words I keep reminding myself with everyday, every night, suddenly doesnt helps anymore at all. What could I do, what should I do.
Indulge.
Nyah! Dance flower, 89 PERFECTS!
Have seen one person getting 300k+ on "Dance flower", nearly reaching 400k. The max I could get for "Dance flower" is 280k, not even near to hers, tsk tsk. I HATE WINNERS! I wish i wish i wish I was her. Then, maybe, I might consider spending money on that game. Breaking my own principle. I dont pay to play!
CLICK TO ENLARGE.
Have seen one person getting 300k+ on "Dance flower", nearly reaching 400k. The max I could get for "Dance flower" is 280k, not even near to hers, tsk tsk. I HATE WINNERS! I wish i wish i wish I was her. Then, maybe, I might consider spending money on that game. Breaking my own principle. I dont pay to play!
CLICK TO ENLARGE.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Dont wait.
"This is a stolen -"
What does it mean? Does it actually meant something? I wish it did.
I got so much questions. And yet again I am confused.
I have given up. Will you even do something?
What does it mean? Does it actually meant something? I wish it did.
I got so much questions. And yet again I am confused.
I have given up. Will you even do something?
Now could I say, why should I? For a person who dont treasure. *Tsk tsk*
Sat there waiting for hours, but you didnt appear.
Everyday, im listening to these musics. Feeling every sound of it. Feeling every emotions in the song. Wondering, is there anyone out there can give me exact feeling the music gave. One did but just a passer by of my life.
Mmm. I indulge.
What sarah said - Death cab for cutie
P.S How disappointing to be talking on the phone with some other guys rather than your own.
Sat there waiting for hours, but you didnt appear.
Everyday, im listening to these musics. Feeling every sound of it. Feeling every emotions in the song. Wondering, is there anyone out there can give me exact feeling the music gave. One did but just a passer by of my life.
Mmm. I indulge.
What sarah said - Death cab for cutie
P.S How disappointing to be talking on the phone with some other guys rather than your own.
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