Got god?

I told my mom about the two dreams I had yesterday.

She said, "The first dream is you kill yourself, the second dream is people killing you. That means huh you got no meaning in your life. You find life meaningless. Dream is displayed out subconsiously. Thats why I said you need spiritual guidance. Be it Christianity, Taoism, Buddism or whatsoever, treat it as a subject if you dont want to believe in God. Treat it as a subject....."

"To debate on?" I interrupted. "Debate on the piece of unreliable evidence."

"Well religious is not all about believing in God. You can disapprove of everything they teach and still go to church."

"HAHAHAHA this is funny. What is baptism?"

"I dont know, go through a process and your name will be registered under God and you will be his children. Something like that. And your every month's salary, 1% or 3% will be donated."

I winced in disgust at the words 'God's children'.

"............." I rolled my eyes. "Gees"

"I got a friend, he told me that he donated his money willingly and he strongly believes in God. Cause he said, hes prayers had been answered several times."

"But sadly mine has not been answered once."

"He has devotion and lots of faith. You dont believe in God aye, so you believe in yourself?"

"Errrrrrrrrr, I dont believe in God and I dont believe in myself either. Nothing. Whatever happens in life, you have to be responsible to it, not God. Whatever good things that happen in life, praise yourself, not God. Its stupid, the whole god thing."

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I need to improve on my verbal literacy. I stutter when speaking, I cant express myself verbally. I seem to have bad english usage when speaking.

LINKIN PARK IS NOT DEAD! WOOOOOOORAY!